Characteristics and Practices That Are Required in a Husband to Reflect the Image of Messiah

Characteristics and Practices That Are Required in a Husband to Reflect the Image of Messiah

Paul, the first century Christian apostle taught that there was/is a “great mystery” (Eph. 5:32) (That which requires the revelation of the Holy Spirit for a person to understand) embodied in the chemistry of the relationship of a husband and wife. This relationship is meant by Yehovah to be reflective of Messiah, (Who according to the Scripture is the God-Man) and the Church. That the “bottom line” of this mystery is that the persons and ministries of Messiah and the Church are meant by God our creator to be reflected in the total dynamics of the male and female persons who grow to adulthood and marry, thus becoming husbands and wives. That the husband is meant by God our creator to be a living mortal representation of the Messiah, and that a wife is meant by Yehovah to be a living mortal representation of the Church, or of its individual member, IE, the Christian Believer.

In this present generation, this truth is by the Holy Spirit being revealed to, and then understood by Believers like no other time since the early Church age. As one (Whether that one is either a man or woman) opens their heart to the truths embodied in this “mystery”, it can and will bring great purpose, worth, direction, and understanding in regards to both life and marriage. For that man and woman will begin to realize like never before, the exalted honor and purpose that Yeshua Himself has placed upon the married couple, the institution of marriage, and the relationship of marriage, in that He formed all of these to work together as a living “picture” of Himself, and that which is the “apple of His eye”, IE the Church.

Oh, Dear One, there is nothing in all of life like purpose. When one's heart begins to be opened to eternal purposes, and the revelation of this mystery is undoubtedly a basic and vital one, this exalts every element of a man or woman's life. All the more, life begins to take on both exalted and eternal reasoning and values. Oh, how I pity those outside of Messiah who spend their lives in vanity, seeking only the temporary pleasures of natural man. None of which can answer the deep abiding need in man to connect with his creator, and walk in the light of that connection.

The following bullet points are expressions highlighting numerous ways in which a husband is meant by God to be a reflection of Messiah in how he relates to his wife. How was this list obtained? Simply by viewing Yeshua. His person, His ministry, how He acts toward the Church. (Or the Church in its most basic unit, IE the individual Believer) From these observations one can begin to learn what characteristics and actions are required in a man for him to be a godly husband. A very great amount can be said concerning any of these following points. Books could be, and for that matter have been written about them. However, inn this article I will only list them in brief and simple terms, commending you to the Holy Spirit to open your mind as you ponder these principles in light of the whole of Scripture. This article speaks in a lesser amount concerning the Believer’s proper response toward Messiah, but please know that the Believers response to Messiah is purposed of God to be a guiding illustration (example) of how a wife ought to relate to her husband. Both sides of the “coin”, a husband being the picture of Messiah, and the wife being a picture of a Believer are spoken of in far greater detail in our book: The Great Husband.

  • Messiah loved the Church and gave Himself for her, (Please note, Messiah never gave Himself to the Church) the Church (Individual Believer) recognizing Messiah’s love begins to respond back to Him in love. In like manner, a husband ought to give himself for (Not to) his wife, and a wife recognizing her husband’s love for her ought to surrender herself to her husband, and love and honor him in return. (Eph. 5:25)

  • Messiah is lord (head) to the Church, the Church (Individual Believer) begins to recognize Messiah’s headship, and therefore to submit to it, and trust in it. In like manner, a husband is lord to his wife, and the wife begins to train herself to submit to, and trust in her husband’s God given headship. (Philippians 2:9-11)

  • Messiah is savior to the Church, and the Church (Individual Believer) recognizing this reality learns to both appreciate it, and walk in the light of it with thanksgiving, humility, and self-sacrifice. In like manner, a husband is to be savior to his wife, and she is to appreciate him for what he is and what he does for her, and to humble herself before him, and cultivate a willingness to sacrifice for him, and for his purposes. (Ephesian 5:23, Revelation 1:6, John 10:11-18)

  • Messiah is teacher to the Church, and the Church (Individual Believer) recognizing that Yehovah’s wisdom is higher than that of this world, learns to receive and walk in the light of it. In like manner, a husband is to teach his wife the ways of God, and they together are to seek to lead their children to the Savior, and to train their children to walk in the light of Yehovah’s ways. (Matthew 7:29, 1 Co. 14:34-35)
  • Messiah is provider to the Church. This does not mean that Messiah provides the needs of His own without their fulfilling their personal responsibilities, but it does mean that all good things come of His hand, and that if we as Believers will do what is right we can expect His blessing and provision. In like manner, a husband is chiefly responsible for the provision needed by his family, but that is not to say he alone is responsible, or that he alone does all the work. (Prov. 31:7-31)

  • Messiah is filled with vision, and provides vision to the Church. In so much as any individual Believer within the Church, or any local Church within the Church at large is willing to prayerfully study the Scripture and seek the Lord, vision will be granted them. In like manner, a husband is designed of the Holy One to be the chief bearer of vision within the family context, and it is the duty and calling of a wife to study him and seek it out, and for him to both possess and share this vision to his own, thus giving purpose and direction to his family. (John 16:13, Matt. 16:18, Eph. 2:7)

  • Messiah nurtures the Church, and the Church makes herself open and available to be nurtured by Him and no other. In like manner, a husband is to nurture his wife, and she is to open her heart to him and no other, and in doing so allow his nurturing of her. (Ephesians 5:29 & Matthew 11:28)

  • Messiah is the defender (Protector - keeper) of the Church, the Church is to look only to Messiah for her defense, (To be protected – to be kept) not turning her heart to another. In like manner, a husband is called to be chief defender and protector to his wife, and she is to cling to him only.

  • Messiah has fellowship with His own in that His own do what is pleasing in His sight. In like manner, when a man and wife have shared godly values there is room for deep and meaningful fellowship as they traverse through the many and varied experiences of life. (1 John 1:5-7, Revelation 3:20)

  • Messiah sympathies with the Church, (Relates to, and bears our infirmities) in response to this the Church is to open her heart to Him only, and keep her higher affections only for Him. In like manner, a husband is to sympathies with his wife receiving her as the weaker vessel, and she is to keep herself firstly to, and for him. (1 Peter 3:1-8, Matt. 22:37)
  • Messiah hears, and is moved in heart when the Church cries out to Him. It is the Church’s duty to humble herself to cry out to Him and no other. In like manner, a husband is to hear the heart cry of his wife, she ought not to have to cry out to others, and she ought not to shame her husband by crying out to others un-necessarily. (Ps. 142:1, Ps. 120:1, Ps. 3:4, Ps. 18:6, Heb. 4:16)

  • Messiah receives and grooms the Church to partner with Himself, the Church recognizing the honor that is offered to her as a partner trains
  • conditions herself to be appropriate for such a calling. In like manner, a husband upon receiving a wife is to “groom” her to be an appropriate partner to himself, and his wife is to train-condition herself to be an appropriate partner to him. (Romans 8: 16-18, 1 Corinthians 3:21-23, 1 Corinthians 3:10, Acts 2:41-43, Acts 15:22-28)

  • Messiah is the initiator of the relationship between Himself and the Believer, and invites the Believer to exercise initiative in respect to approaching Him. In like manner, a man is to be the chief initiator in respect to a perspective wife, but in so doing he invites her to show initiative toward him. (John 15:16, Revelation 3:20, Psalms 24:5-6 & 27:4 & 27:8)

  • Messiah calls out to (courts) every soul of man, those that respond in faith become Believers, and He becomes the husband of their spirit. In like manner, a man will call, or court, or woo a woman to himself. (Romans 2:4, John 6:44, Matt. 11:28, Matt. 16:24)

  • Messiah demands that anyone coming to Himself enter into covenant with Him, there is no loose relationship in respect to Messiah. In like manner, a man calling a woman to himself must demand that they enter into the covenant of marriage as is witnessed by God above, and earthly witnesses, and any wise and godly woman will before marriage demand the same of a man who is wishing an intimate relationship with her. (Luke 14:27, Hebrews 8:10-13)

  • Messiah is lover to the Church, and the Church appreciating the intimacy that is experienced with Messiah returns the same to him and keeps her heart only to, and for Him. In like manner, a husband is to study to be a lover to his wife and she is to return the same intimacy to him, and keep herself in every way as unto him, and him only. (John 15:9-10, John 14:21-23)

  • Messiah shares His inheritance with the Church, therefore the Church reigns in life, and in His name possesses all things. In like manner, a husband is to share what he possesses with his wife, she is to recognize who provided it and owns it, and she is to possess what is given her in a way that is honoring to the one who provided it. (Ro. 18:15-17, Ro. 8:29, John 15:9)

  • Messiah shares His ministry with the Church, so that He and the Church become co-laborers. The Church learning and receiving all the qualities of His heart steps forward to minister back to Messiah and to others around her. (Especially to those of the household of faith) In like manner, a husband having received a calling from the Lord invites and expects that his wife will open her heart to receive at least a portion of the burden of his calling and support him as he seeks to fulfill his ministry assignment. (2 Corinthians 5:19-20, 2 Corinthians 6:1, Gen. 2:18)

  • Messiah shares His name (Title) with the Church, and every person who is truly a Believer is honored to bear his name (Title) and begins to identify with Him in that they refer to themselves as CHRISTIANS. In like manner, a husband is to share his name, and both the privileges and responsibility of his place and rank in life with his wife. She is to make her prior identity and devotions of second importance to those she received by entering into convent with her husband, and make an open display of her identity and devotion to her husband. (Acts 11:26, Lk. 9:26)

  • Summer Messiah is jealous concerning the Church, always desiring and expecting her first (foremost) worship and devotion, all true Believers recognize this and press continually to keep themselves wholly unto the Lord. In like manner, a husband will be jealous of the first worship and devotion of the woman he has taken to himself as a wife, and the wife most recognize that the first and highest place in her heart in human-earthly terms must only belong to her husband. (Ex. 20:8, Ex. 34:14, Prov. 6:34)

  • Messiah owns His own, firstly by the right of creation, and more importantly by the right of purchase, the which, He did at the expense of His own life’s blood. Each soul of man that has come to Him by faith is His property, His treasured possession. In keeping with this understanding wise societies though the ages have practiced the tradition of a bride’s price, a man purchasing a wife from another man, typically this was a virgin woman, and the bride-price was paid to her father. However, regardless of any marriage tradition (They can vary greatly depending on the depth of wisdom and value system of the group) by Yehovah’s law a bride belongs to her husband. However, the possession that a wife is to a husband is not like that of a car or a house. She cannot be sold or traded, and must never be neglected or abused, but none the less she belongs to her husband, for he has become both responsible for, and in authority over the woman he has taken to himself as a wife. A wife’s response to this ownership is to mirror the attitude and behavior that is to be found in the faithful Believer toward Messiah. To seek to submit to, be obedient to, and be valuable to her lord and master, for she understands she is an ultimate possession to him. (Ex. 19:5, 1 Pet. 2:9, Prov. 31:10, Prov. 12:4)

  • Messiah is at the same time husband to the Church at large, and husband to the spirit of each of its members. Any local Church or individual Believer properly responding is not jealous of Messiah’s affection and dealing with another that is in covenant with Him. In like manner by Yehovah’s design and law, a husband may bring more than one wife into his family. The family aspect is single, but it is comprised of more than one wife. His wives recognizing His husband-ship to each that are His own, are not jealous or competitive of the other, but supportive of each of the parts of the family, and the family as a whole. This family arrangement will become common in these last days, and in the age that is to come. (Isaiah 4:1-6, 2 Sam. 12:18, Is. 54:5, 2 Co. 11:2, 1 Co. 6:17)

  • Messiah operates by means of the character of that wisdom that is from above, and is the God given avenue of wisdom to His own. The Church responds to this by learning and operating out of the same spirit of wisdom. If a husband is wise to continually sow into His wife the aspects of the wisdom that is from above, it will in many (Not necessarily always) cases bear fruit in her, and he will see a bountiful harvest of the fruits of godliness come forth in her life. (Ja. 3:17, Matt. 11:28, Ro. 8:29, Eph. 5: 21-31)

  • Messiah sows His seed into the Church, and then shares parenthood with the Church. You may ask, how is this so? Every person that is born again, is so by the seed of God. Yeshua’s word is sown into the world, and the hearts that receive the love of the truth are allowed to conceive life, thus a new creation is birthed. This process happens through the Church, therefore each new Christian (New creature in Messiah, 2 Co. 5:17) is not only a child of God, but of the Church. That is why Believers everywhere not only learn the attributes of the Lord, but also of the Church. In like manner, a man sows the seed of his body into his wife and by the power of God conception occurs, and in time a new person will come forth. The two people share parenthood, not only passing on to the child the physical characteristics of each of them, but also their personality traits and values. (1Peter 1:23, Matthew 13:3-23)

  • Messiah chastens His own, and His own realizing His right of ownership understand that He has the right to chasten them, and becoming persuaded of Messiah’s wise and good intention the Believer submits to Messiah’s chastening. In like manner, a husband has the right to chasten His own in that he possesses the right of ownership. However, if a husband is not wise and faithful to play the man in respect to the basics of his own life and character, Family and if it is not completely clear to his wife that his intent toward her is both good and wise, then it is un-likely that she will respond properly. A wife’s duty is to act toward her husband in faith in this area of marriage as in all others. She must by faith receive him as the one who possesses both the right and duty to chasten. (Revelation 2:4 & 3:14-17 & 20-23 & 3:2-3 & 3:15-19)

  • Messiah both can, and will divorce His own if His own abandon their faith in Him. In like manner, a husband has the right and duty to divorce a wife that refuses to be faithful to him, and a wife has the right to divorce a husband who has abandoned faith, and before God and the Church walks in open sin and refuses to repent. (Revelation 2:5 & 3:5, 1 Co. 7:13, 1 Co. chapters 5&6)

  • Messiah gives gifts unto His own. In like manner, a husband will present a wife with gifts. (Eph. 4:11, 1 Co. 12:1-31)

  • Messiah speaks words of delight, encouragement, affirmation, and praise to His own. A wise and godly husband considers this, and patterns his own life and character after Yeshua’s example. (Ps. 126:2, Ps. 12:6, Ps. 139:17-18)

  • Messiah deeply and caringly knows His own, and possesses deep and powerful desire for His own to know Him in return. A Believer who has learned to humble him/herself, and who by faith learned to deny him/herself will learn to forsake his/her own desires and agendas so that he/she might know and understand what makes Messiah “tic”, and then he/she will do their best to give themselves to doing their part in pleasing the One who calls all Believers unto Himself, and to know His word, and finish His work. In the like fashion of Messiah, a husband who is in tune to the ways and person of Yeshua will seek to know a wife, to understand her, to learn her ways, to pay attention to her, to study her. and he will possess a deep desire to be understood and appreciated by a wife. Although there are numerous principles of attitude and action which a wife is instructed to observe toward a husband, this principle will trump many of them, for in his heart he cries to be understood and appreciated by a wife. A woman, who understands her role as a wife, and particularly if she feels loved and cherished in her marriage, and most especially if she conducts herself in humility, faith, and deep devotion toward God will study her husband to understand him and determine within herself to deny herself, and be on the same page as what he is. For she will see her devotion to her husband, as an act of devotion to God. (Jer. 1:5, Eph. 1:4, Ps. 139:13, Gen. 4:1, 1 Pet. 3:1-8)

  • As Messiah cherishes His own, counting His own of more worth than His own life, counting His own as a treasure that is beyond limits in its worth to him, in like manner a husband is to value--cherish his wife, and those she brings forth to him. (Eph. 5:29-30, 2 Co.5:14-15, Rev. 1:6)

For a greatly expanded version of this teaching please get our book: The Great Husband

An American Watchman,
Gregory A DeHart

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